Greer's Snowy Day

Thursday, January 18, 2018

There is nothing quite so wonderful as watching your toddler soak in the magic of snow. From the moment Greer woke up and peered out the windows yesterday morning, until the sun went down, my girl was clamoring on about how pretty the snow was. She loves watching it fall most of all, just like her mama. Throughout the day she told me all the things she wanted to do in the snow....sled, make snowballs, and have more snow fall down. She got her wish later in the afternoon, and the delight was spread across her rosy little cheeks the entire time. 


The moment her daddy threw a snowball at her instead of mama. Shocked and full of giggles. Then she decided to retaliate....and threw a snowball at me. Though her snowball was mostly a lot of snow dust. But, oh how she loves to pick the snow up, shape it into a ball (losing most of the snow in the process), tossing it at me, then wiping it off of my snow pants. 

While I'm so very ready for spring, warmer days, and blooming flowers, I do love a winter wonderland covered in powdery snow. There's so much beauty in it. So we'll enjoy it while it's here, and get super excited for the warm temperatures that are supposed to be here this weekend! 



Junebug Bumpdate || 18 Weeks

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Happy 18 weeks to Junebug! I feel like this pregnancy is flying, and our baby will be here before we know it. The bump has been around for a while, but is really starting to make itself known. Currently, our whole house is fighting off the remainder of some horrible cold. It hit me first, then took husband and Greer down too. I have to say, being sick while pregnant is a whole different ball game; and I'm not a fan at all. Here's to hoping this is the last illness that strikes for the year. Wouldn't that be lovely?! Now more on this sweet baby!


B A C K S T O R Y

  • So let me back up quite a bit and share how we found out we were expecting. It was a Tuesday in early October. I had a hair appointment later in the evening, so I put a baked ziti recipe in the crock pot to feed husband and Greer dinner while I was gone. When I got home, I was immediately met with the smell of something burning when I opened the front door. It was so strong, but husband couldn't smell a thing. My intuition said, "You're pregnant!" But, I felt hesitant to hope for that since we had gotten three "no's" in the months before. I couldn't wait, though. I was in the very early window of taking a pregnancy test, and while husband read bedtime stories to our girl, I snuck off to take a test. I waited what felt like forever (isn't that always the case?) Then returned to check the results, which clearly showed only one line (not pregnant). I was sad and disappointed and relayed the test result to husband. We finished bedtime with Greer and tucked her in. I had a nagging sensation to double check the test that I had thrown in the trash about twenty minutes earlier. Sure enough, there it was....the faintest second pink line. Husband and I examined that tiny line, totally unsure if it meant we were pregnant or if the test had been compromised since it had been turned upside down in the trash. I was all ready to take another test, but we were out. After a little convincing, husband ran to the store to grab more tests for his not-so-patient wife. I took the second test, left it on the counter for about 10 minutes before checking, and like the first, there was the faintest second line. I waited two days to take another test, which only gave me another faint second line. Then on Saturday, we got the bright pink second line we had been praying for. 


H E A L T H
  • Overall, everything has been great health-wise during this pregnancy. Of course, I'm getting over a bad cold now, but that really hasn't affected the baby at all. It's just left this mama lagging a bit. I mentioned last week in a personal post that we had a scare at the beginning of the pregnancy. I was sent to the emergency room at six weeks to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. I was having constant pain around my ovaries that had been lasting for a couple of weeks. Thankfully, the doctor was able to see that baby was in the correct spot and the pain I was having was due to the rupturing of ovarian cysts. I was so very thankful for an answer and a baby safely growing in the right location. 
  • The sickness, well constant nausea, wiped me out in the early weeks. It has slowly gotten better, and I'm almost to the point of it being completely gone. This is much different than my pregnancy with Greer. The all-day nausea lasted through 12-14 weeks, and was then gone with the arrival of the second trimester. This time around, it is lasting far longer. While the nausea is just about gone, my appetite is still not back in the evenings, making dinner-planning a real challenge. Nothing sounds appealing, but just about everything is appalling. Worst of all, what might sound good the day we try to plan out the weekly menu, sounds terrible the day we are set to eat it. 
  • Weight gain has been moderate, with six pounds gained to date. Honestly, I'm surprised it isn't more with the amount of carbs and sweets I've been consuming. Just like with Greer, these are the two food groups that I am drawn to, while all others make my stomach turn.
  • I'm not prone to breaking out outside of pregnancy, but the break-outs on my face returned (just like Greer's pregnancy) with the arrival of the second trimester. I'm guessing this will last until the third trimester or so. 
  • The reflux showed up last week to my dismay. I had it pretty badly with Greer, but it didn't show up this early, that I recall. Give me all the Tums.
  • I officially felt baby move on New Year's Day! And since then, the movements have become more pronounced and more frequent. I love feeling all kicks and flutters!


S L E E P
  • I was sleeping around eleven hours in the beginning. I was literally exhausted by 8:00 in the evenings, and would crash hard around 9:00/9:30 at  night. Once I got to the 12 week marker, I was able to push my bedtime a little later, but not by much. I'm finding now that I can go until 11:00, but mostly I like to climb in bed around 10:30. 
  • The insomnia is kicking in now that it's harder to find a comfortable position to sleep in. I love sleeping on my belly, and well, that's not an option. Middle of the night bathroom breaks are also now disrupting my sleep. 


E M O T I O N S

  • I can definitely tell that I am more emotional during pregnancy. Crying comes easier (I'm not a cryer by nature), but I think motherhood is partly the reasoning behind that too. 
  • Anxiety is something I have to work through, especially when pregnant. And I think a lot of that is due to having miscarried with our first baby. You can read more on that here
  • I've felt really strongly that we are having a second girl since around week 10. However, I'm starting to rethink that notion as we near the gender reveal. While my pregnancy has been very similar to Greer's, it's also had some key differences, which make me think maybe Junebug is a boy. 
  • We are excitedly awaiting the gender reveal in t-minus 15 days!!!


H U S B AN D
  • He has been an absolute saint during this pregnancy. Husband has taken on almost all of my typical around-the-house responsibilities, especially during the first trimester. I was so nauseous and exhausted that I was barely surviving the days at home with Greer. Laundry, dishes, making meals, taking care of Greer in the evenings, house chores....you name it, he did it/is still doing it.
  • Husband thinks we are having another girl, hands-down. Either way, he is over the moon for this baby and will  be so excited for a boy or a girl. He's already the world's best girl-dad, so it will be a lot of fun to see him either expand his role as a boy-and-girl dad or keep on being incredible with daughters.
     
  • He felt the baby move over this past weekend, and it was super sweet and special. 


G R E E R
  • It's been so fun watching love on this baby sibling of hers. She likes to give sugars and hugs to Junebug, which melts me.
  • When asked, Greer says she wants a baby sister. I think either way, she's going to be so very thrilled to have a baby of her own :)
  • When we go to baby appointments, she loves hearing the heartbeat, exclaiming, "It's Junebug!" The last time we saw baby via sonogram, Greer couldn't stop telling us that she had seen the baby on t.v. I'm looking forward to the anatomy scan to watch Greer take in this baby again. She's so very aware, and that makes it all the more fun!
  • Just a little over a week ago, Greer transitioned to a big girl bed. We told her she would be giving the crib to Junebug, and she was simply delighted by the notion. 


C U R R E N T L Y    L O V I N G



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A January Friday Favorites

Friday, January 12, 2018

Happy Friday, y'all! I can't believe we are cruising through January so quickly! As I sit and type this post out, my windows are cracked open with the faintest breeze coming through every now and then, my lilac-scented candle is burning, and Greer is bringing me the pretend food she has prepared for taste-testing. I love mornings like this, they are easily my favorite. While this weather and temperature spike into the 60's isn't staying around (it leaves tomorrow), it has me so very excited for spring! I can't wait to get outside for stroller walks or playtime in the backyard. It's going to be a sweet spring as we prepare for the arrival of our Junebug. 

Speaking of baby, I jumped on IG stories yesterday to chat gender and baby's heart rate. I loved all the messages you all sent about your experience with predicting gender based on the heart rate. I'm going to try to jump on today to share some of the results that were shared with me. So stayed tune for that, and be sure to give me a follow on Instagram if you haven't already!


I've been loving so many different things over the last couple of weeks. Sometimes that's hard in the dead of winter. But, there's nothing like a fresh bouquet of tulips (thanks, husband!) and a spring candle to lift your spirits a bit. We've been making little transitions around the house and working on projects, which is also a nice way to feel refreshed. Don't you feel that way too??

So, between Christmas and my upcoming birthday, I've been gifted a few new things that I am absolutely loving and wanted to share with you!

  • Maternity jeans can be so tricky, especially when trying to find a pair that don't scream 'maternity!' So I decided to give this new pair a try, and I'm crazy about them. I can't wait to find a reason to head out and wear them. 
  • I'm super excited about these new sneakers that just arrived yesterday! They are an early birthday gift from husband, and they are beautiful! **they're on great sale right now too!
  • My sister got me the coziest sweatshirt for Christmas, and it's going to be great to wear throughout pregnancy and after. It has zippers on both sides so I can make some extra room for the growing bump. My sweatshirt is the taupe color, and if you saw me on IG stories yesterday, then you saw me wearing it. I also wear a size medium for reference; it's oversized and a big baggy, which is exactly what I wanted. The plus, is that it's a longer sweatshirt so I can wear it with jeans or leggings comfortably!
  • A favorite drink year round is a latte with half white mocha and half toffee nut. This week I ordered the iced version, and it was SO good. Try one out (iced or hot) the next time you swing through a Starbucks!
  • I just applied this nail polish color yesterday for a fun pop of color. When Greer saw it she asked to have her nails painted pink too :) If it's too bright for your liking this time of year, I also love this option!



What are some of your favorites this new year? Happy weekending, friends!

p.s. the sweatshirt I'm wearing in the photo can be found here!

**Affiliate links were used in this post. Thank you for supporting the blog!

When The Sting Of Miscarriage Lingers

Monday, January 8, 2018
Today I wanted to share a personal post that resonates with me deeply. I share in hopes of reaching just one other lady out there who has walked through the trials of miscarriage and carries worries with her as she celebrates another pregnancy. Because in my heart of hearts I know I'm not the only one feeling this way, and I want that one other gal to know she's not alone.

If you've experienced the high of finding out you're expecting, only to be followed by the lowest of lows, the devastating news that there is no longer a heartbeat, you are well aware of the anxiety and hesitation for excitement you carry with you in regards to future pregnancies. Once you've been through a miscarriage, whether it's your first or fourth, whether you already have children or not, you are left with an uneasiness that I'm not sure ever truly resolves itself while you are growing your family. But, I do believe there is hope for conquering the everyday worries and for having a pregnancy(s) that is not, in one way or another, tainted with the devastation of having lost a baby.


Personally,  my miscarriage with our first baby has ultimately affected the pregnancies that have followed. It's hard not to feel as though your body has failed you in one way or another and so many questions arise about why, the chance for recurrence, the success of a future pregnancy, and so on. I was able to find a lot of comfort in the Lord during and after my miscarriage, relying on His sovereignty and resisting the need to have all of my questions answered. The six weeks that followed one of my worst days, were filled with healing and an unexplainable peace. I was able to be happy without feeling guilty, and that was an enormous part of overcoming the sadness. 

But, when husband and I were surprised with our pregnancy with Greer, it was difficult not to be consumed with worry during the first trimester, most specifically the first nine weeks. Even after making it into the second and third trimesters, I would find myself concerned for the baby's well-being, cultivating anxiety over each baby appointment with the dread that they wouldn't find the heartbeat. While I was excited about the arrival of our baby, I experienced plenty of days filled with worry that another miscarriage could happen. It's hard not to after you have known loss.

Now, two years later, I still carry some of the same anxieties as I progress through my third pregnancy. I look for warning signs, over-worry about a symptom, pay attention for any spotting, become hyper-aware of baby's movements or lack thereof when I am finally able to feel him/her, etc. The best way to sum it up is that because of experiencing a miscarriage, I am less worry-free over many aspects of pregnancy; where anxiety might not have existed, it now does. And while I thought the fears would subside after having a healthy pregnancy, truth be told, some days my miscarriage is as fresh in my mind as though it just happened. We had a scare early on with this baby (at six weeks) that left me in tears when my doctor insisted I head to the emergency room to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. Every memory from our miscarriage date flooded my thoughts; I began prepping myself for bad news, for another loss, for sadness. After hours of waiting and being tested, we walked away knowing our sweet Junebug was in the correct place with a beautiful and strong heartbeat. Though the baby is healthy and thriving, there is nothing like a scare to flair up old fears. And it's something I find myself battling against throughout these weeks and months of pregnancy.

What I've come to understand is that my anxiety produced from my miscarriage is normal. It's okay for me to feel the worries as long as I don't dwell in them, allowing the fears to overcome me. Talking through my feelings as they pop up is also a way to control the likelihood of runaway-anxiety. I've found that sharing my fears out loud with husband and/or friends has given me a safe sounding board to express where I'm at and find resolve in my fears, tackling them instead of drowning in them. Taking time to celebrate the life growing inside of me, finding joy in the firsts of each pregnancy, and trusting the Lord's goodness are also so important in conquering the moments when the anxiety arises.

To the ladies out there who struggle with the sting of miscarriage as they move forward in hopes of another pregnancy or find themselves in the golden days of the second trimester, I hope you know that your fears don't make you crazy. You aren't irrational in your worries, but do take the time to work through them and give yourself space (lots of it!) to feel joyful and exuberant about a new baby.