Confessions of a Newly Married Man, Pt. 3

August 19, 2014

Hello again! Today's confessions come to you from Claytor lake, where Astleigh and I are soaking in the sun and relaxing with some of my family. That's a benefit of being married: you have two families to vacation with! However laying out in the sun is not what I came here to talk to you about, but rather about my confessions as a newly married man...


I have become a design connoisseur. Since we moved into our house last year we have had to make a ton of decisions on where to place furniture, photo frames, and little decorating nuances.We still are juggling with some of those decisions as we finish up our office (last room, so close!). I admit that when we got married and moved into the place, I thought Astleigh would take care of decorating completely. After all, she did almost go to school for interior design and enjoys that sort of thing. I on the other hand have anything but an eye for design. My college dorm room was "decorated" with music posters and items from my welding class. That kind of stuff doesn't make the cut when decorating your home alongside your wife. 

From the first photo frame to the last decorative touch on the built-in bookshelves, Astleigh has asked for my opinion on placement. It didn't take me long to realize that my "it looks fine" responses didn't cut it, and that I needed to actually form an opinion and express it. It's taken awhile, but I'm finally starting to get the hang of this whole decorating thing. Now when we go out to friend's houses or to stores I pick up on ways they decorated and tell Astleigh the things I like or the things I don't. I know it makes Astleigh proud. Who knew placement was such a big deal? 

I eat a lot better because we plan.  Not just healthier, but a lot more consistently. At the beginning of a given week, I know what I will be eating for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every single day that week. This is a huge accomplishment for me. See, when Astleigh and I met I was lucky to know what I was going to eat for my next meal. Having a meal plan on campus for three years will do that to you, where stopping by a dining hall whenever you were hungry was the protocol. When Astleigh and I started dating; not only was she beautiful and I liked her a whole lot, but she always had food (what an added benefit!). Yes, I am simple to please.  Now that we are married, Sunday rolls around and we make a list for the whole week. Sometimes that's a quick 10-15 minute chore, and sometimes it takes hours (exaggerating a little bit maybe) of scouring through the pages of Food Network and Better Homes and Gardens magazines for the perfect recipes. I actually like cooking, so having the meal plan and all the ingredients planned out and bought ahead of time is really nice when it comes to finally making the meals.

The littlest things can make the biggest impact. What I mean is that something little I say (or the lack of saying anything), a facial expression, or a small gesture can make such a huge impact on Astleigh. If I am not really talkative one morning, she thinks something is wrong. If I hold her hand while walking around and give her little hugs and kisses throughout our evening she feels loved. If I seem completely interested in something else other than her when she asks me a question, she feels forgotten. And when she expressed these emotions to me, I shamefully admit that I would get frustrated.I thought it was annoying that the littlest thing could put her off. It would be dishonest of me to say that it still doesn't annoy me sometimes. But I have found that she shares these things with me, asking if something is wrong when I am quiet and needing my affection, because she cares about how I feel and really loves me. Once I started to realize that, I started to focus on fixing how I came off rather then getting frustrated for it. I still have a long way to go, but so far it has made me a better morning person.

I have missed so many man movies.  Captain America 2, Godzilla, Guardians of the Galaxy, and the list goes on. Why aren't explosions, giant lizards, and costume-clad super heroes as exciting to her as a goofy plot with two people slowly falling in love?

My nightly routine has gotten a lot longer.  Up until marriage, the only thing I had to do before going to bed was brush my teeth, which then seemed like a chore in itself. Even in a dorm room, where there was a sink literally right beside my bed, I would want to skip the routine and go straight to bed. Now, I still don't do more than brush my teeth with the addition of an occasional flossing routine, but when you're married, you just don't go to bed until you both can go to bed. That means that as she goes through her nightly routine of makeup removal, facial cleansing, teeth brushing, and so on, I am still awake and waiting for her to finish and join me in bed. Don't be fooled husbands, even though it may not take you long you to get yourself ready for bed, you still have to wait on your spouse. And let's be honest, that takes a bit of time.

There's just one more Tuesday left in August, and that means just one more Confessions post from yours truly. Check out Part 1 and Part 2!